Paul’s CAT scan was on June 7th. He was scheduled to see his oncologist on
June 12th. We were not too
excited to wait through the weekend to find out the results. Fortunately, or unfortunately, depending on
the way you look at it…Paul had to go in to Huntsman on Friday, June 8th
because he has been having pain in his kidney area. The pain also shoots down into his groin
area… There was concern of kidney problems (one of his chemo drugs can cause kidney
damage). While Paul was being checked
out by his doctor, he informed Paul that the CAT scan looked clean! That was great news! No evidence of cancer at the moment! His doctor also said his blood work looked
great, so they did not think it was kidney problems. They scheduled Paul for an MRI on June 11th
because his doctor is thinking it is some back /spinal problems…
So, Paul had an MRI last Monday, that night his oncologist
called and asked to speak with Paul. My
heart about flew out of my chest. Every
time you get a call from a doctor, especially the same day as you have had a
test, you feel instant panic! He called
to tell Paul that the MRI showed some thickening around one of his nerves, but
that they weren’t sure what was going on.
He said they were going to get his MRI from last year and compare the
two. Once they have compared the two
scans, hopefully they will have more answers.
So, we meet with the doctor on June 22nd to find out more
information. We are hoping that all he
needs is some physical therapy. Neither
one of us want to deal with another surgery…
For those of you who don’t know, Paul has had three major
surgeries in the last two years. The
first attempt to fix his back was a surgery that almost killed him…a ruptured
iliac vein…he bled out on the table and had to have 15 units of blood, then 2
months later he had his spinal fusion, and then a year later he had his stomach
removed.
Paul has already had his esophagus stretched 5 times this
year and is going to have it done again on June 26th. Poor guy is starting to “gack” more
again. He informed me yesterday that he
is back to 169 pounds. We were keeping
him around 172 for quite awhile. Yep,
he is skinny at 6’ 3”.
Paul’s hair is coming in a nice dark gray with some light
gray. At first it was all very light
gray…We will see if it changes back to his brown color, but it’s not too
likely. He was really hoping it would
come back in black and curly! He wanted
some chemo curls! Somehow I just can’t
picture him with black, curly hair… the thought of it makes me smile!
In the past two months, two more people in our family were
diagnosed with cancer. First, our
daughter’s mother-in-law was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. She is currently undergoing chemotherapy in
hopes to shrink her tumors enough to operate.
She is fighting with all she has to beat this nasty cancer! Second, Paul’s
sister was diagnosed with a rare uterine cancer called Leiomyosarcoma. Only about 1000 people in the U.S. are
diagnosed with this type of cancer in a year.
She will start her chemotherapy tomorrow. She is amazing like Paul. I have no doubt she will kick the cancer to
the curb!
Cancer is mean and evil.
Paul and I know that we will be on pins and needles the next scan he has
in four months. Last week we found out
one of our friends cancer has returned.
He had his scan the same week as Paul.
It was very heart-breaking news to us…and of course, to them. We seriously thought he had beat his
lymphoma. He will start chemo again
tomorrow and then have a stem cell transplant in a couple of months. Our prayers and thoughts go out to them as
well.
This past year has been such a learning experience for our
family. One of many things I have
learned about is the power of prayer.
Prayer works. At times in the
past, I used to wonder why we needed to pray.
Seriously, why pray? Why didn’t
God just fix things, he “knows” what I want?
When we were born on this earth, we were given a thing called agency…the
right to choose for ourselves. I have
come to realize it would be contradictory for God to do things without our
asking. We must ask and it is through
prayer that we ask for help. I have also
realized that what I think is best may not really be what is best. Only God knows what is best for us…even if we
think we know best. Often times, God
answers our prayers through others. We have been helped through some very tough
times. Our problems did not necessarily
vanish, but we were helped. We literally
could feel the prayers of others. We have received such kindness and loving
acts of service.
There have been times lately, I have thought a lot about the
statement that we will not be given more than we can handle. For those of you who have watched the movie,
“The Christmas Story” (Red-rider BB Gun), I have felt like shouting “uncle, uncle, uncle” numerous times. What that means is, I have felt like I have
been pushed to my limit. But I guess God
disagrees…I am finding I am stronger than I thought. At the end of each day, I feel happy that I
made it through… Trust me there are days I am not sure that I am strong enough
to handle everything…
Life is about one day at a time. Each day we need to find something we are
grateful for. I made a gratitude board
for my family. The theory is we will all
write something we are grateful for everyday and post it on the board. The reality is I see the board every day and
it reminds me to think about something I am grateful for. Some days you might just be grateful for
toothpaste or toilet paper, but I can guarantee you will always be able to find
things you are grateful for! Just for
the record, it is still my goal to get us all to write something and post it
everyday!!!
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| Our gratitude board...this was taken before I put it out to use... |
On June 4-6th, Paul had the opportunity to go on a cancer retreat sponsored by http://reelrecovery.org/ What an amazing experience for him! I will let him write a post telling about it. I just want to thank all the "angels" who made this possible!
Today I feel so blessed and am grateful for a wonderful
husband. He is an amazing father and
friend. I love you Paul!
